Archive > May 2007

H is for horrid

Heather » 31 May 2007 » In kvetching, body » 3 Comments

I hate my breasts.

I have porn star breasts. Well, w/out the plastic.

They’re annoying.

I went clothes shopping today, and, as usual, it was bothersome.

I’m getting much better at being able to tell right away whether a shirt will look good on me or not. I hate looking at the majority of things on the rack (ha!) or the mannequins and having to dismiss it w/out even trying it on.

There aren’t a lot of clothes that look good on the well-endowed. Empire waist? Try mid-nipple waist. Peasant shirt? More like cup the breasts greedily then hang off them exhausted, making Heather look fat(ter).

I find the tops that look best are things w/ no seams in the front, and clingy. Loose things don’t really work on the chubby, oddly enough. Elasticy-clingy is best, at least on me.

I’m loosing weight. That’s good. I still have a ways (weighs? Bwaa haa!) to go. But what if they don’t get significantly smaller? I don’t want to get a breast reduction - I’ll lose all the sensation in my nipples, and then what would be the point of living?

And they’re always there. I wish I had a sportier pair I could trot out once in a while.

Has anyone reading this ever had breast reduction surgery? Tell me about it, please.

Abundantly yours,
Heather

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